Gotta figure out something to do with Gage on Saturday.  Mom & Joe are having the breakers re-wired so the power’ll be off.  Gage doesn’t handle that well.  He walks around trying to turn things on and getting upset that they’re not turning on.  So I’m gonna take him out to do something.  Just dunno what yet.

Gage is doing really good in school.  Next year he’ll be in the more advanced Autism class, which is excellent news.  I’m so very excited and proud and all of that.  We’ve signed up for the Autism walk again this year.  We want to make it an annual thing.  Starting the fund raising so we’re not scrambling at the last minute to try to get donations.

Work is work.  One of our more unpleasant customers was in today — skunk lady.  She attempted to make amends for some of the nastiness she’s unleashed.  Alas, she was attempting to make amends to the wrong person.  Which was both disturbing and amusing at the same time.  Maybe she’s sincere.  I’m not sure I buy it.

Searching for a new car.  New used car, that is.  Found a couple of options that look like they’ll be reliable, budget friendly and kind of “fit” as far as me getting behind the wheel without needing 25 pillows to be able to see over the dashboard.  Shortness has it’s challenges, you know.

Read New Moon and Eclipse this weekend.  Good books.  Can’t wait to see the movies.  Now I just need to get a copy of Breaking Dawn and complete the series.  I dunno about that whole “Team Edward/Team Jacob” thing.  Frankly, I think Bella should stick with Edward and send me a Jacob.  I’d definitely like a Jacob in my life.  Or maybe an Edward.  Both at the same time could be interesting, too.  LOL

And while I’m on the subject… what do you do with the eggs, bread and milk?  Are you making french toast?  I mean, everyone rushes out and gets eggs, milk and bread when they hear it’s going to snow.  Why that particular variety of items?  It sounds an awful lot like you’re making french toast while you’re waiting out the storm.  How nice for you.  Pray tell, how you going to cook those eggs if the power goes out?  Just a thought.

I seriously don’t get it.

On Friday, I got some stunningly terrible news regarding one of my best friends in the world.  Let’s just say that the news was heartbreakingly earth-shattering.

On top of that, my Grandmother died this morning.  We’re all pretty shaken up, but holding in there as best as can be expected.  Gage doesn’t know what’s going on, he’s just upset that people keep bursting into tears.  Grandma was great.  I loved visiting her when I was a kid.  I wish I’d been able to take Gage down to meet her.

Add to that the two major snow storms we had and the hellish days they made at work, and so far February is turning out ot be one hell of a bad month.  Calgon, take me away.

But I digress.  People ask me these questions.  I tell them my son has Autism.  99% of the time, the response is “I’m so sorry…” Excuse me?  Why are you sorry?  He’s my son, Autism doesn’t change that.  I wouldn’t trade anything in the world for the joy of having that little boy.  In fact, I think I’m blessed, because I appreciate the little things so much more because of it.

Spontaneous I love yous for example, you know, the ones that come without hearing it first.  The ones where a child will simply say it, completely out of the blue.  My son will, with prompting, often repeat the phrase “I love you” to someone who has said it to him.  But very rarely does he say it spontaneously.  Other kids do it all the time.  I think I got 4 or 5 spontaneous I love yous from my niece today alone.  Don’t get me wrong, it’s special when she tells me she loves me and it’s dear to me.  But it’s nothing compared to my son saying it.  He’s given very few people a spontaneous I love you, and I’ve noticed that when he does he has perfect enunciation, he looks the person in the eye and he is very focused.  It’s as if, for just a moment, the sensory jumble/overload that he endures every day clears and he’s saying “this is me, the real me who’s hiding inside here and I have to tell you this now because I don’t know how long it will last… I love you.”  That is a moment that brings people to tears.  I’m the most frequent recipient, I’ve heard it 4 times since he was born.

There are things that I may be missing.  People have asked me about missing out on things because my son isn’t “normal” but I don’t think I’m missing out on anything.  My son is different, so the things I experience may be different.  I’ve seen my son spend an hour fascinated with a lady bug crawling on his kiddie pool and then on his arm.  Looking close, breathing on it, touching it’s back… When he was done watching the lady bug, he picked it up and put it on a dandelion.  I’ve seen my son successfully turn our front yard into a dandelion garden in the span of one summer.  The salad was excellent.  My son finds fascination in things I never noticed before, or that I took for granted before.  But when I play alongside him, I find myself having fun that I wish I’d discovered as a child, too.

My son’s not broken.  There’s no reason to be sorry for me.  My son is different, and yes he can be quite challenging.  But he’s extremely special and perfect in every single way, as far as I’m concerned.