Ladies and gentlemen, consider me your grocery liaison, and let’s discuss somethings you’re doing wrong…
First of all, if you have no intention of bagging or helping to bag your groceries, you have no right to separate the items into piles and tell the cashier or bagger what you want in each bag. Sorry, there ARE the rules.
Second, if a bagger comes over to help bag, do NOT send them away, unless you intend to do the bagging yourself. Also, do not tell them to wait until you can supervise the bagging, because guess what… They will walk the fuck away and help someone else.
Third, your cashier does not care. We do not need a 20 minute explanation about why the bags have to be very very light. You asked for them to be packed light, we will pack them light. I don’t care if you’ve had surgery on your hand or shoulder or if your fibromyalgia is flaring up. I don’t care if arthritis means you can’t lift heavy bags. It doesn’t matter. I’m sorry your kids don’t call or that you don’t have anyone to talk to. I’m not there to fill that void. I’m here to ring you up, possibly bag your items hand send you on your way. I want your items on the conveyer belt, I want your club card, your coupons, your help bagging, your money, and your ass out the door.
And finally… Personal hygiene. Know it, use it, love it. It’s fantastic that you work with and/or own horses. Really, that’s great! And yes, I understand that it involves some encountering of manure. But if you’ve been shoveling horse shit all day, do us all a favor and shower and change your clothes before you go to the grocery store. If you suffer from incontinence, I’m very sorry to hear that. But there are products out there that prevent you from wetting yourself so badly that pants are saturated and your shoes squish when you walk. Use them. There is no way for me to know that you’re wearing an adult diaper, but it’s very obvious when you’re not, particularly if you’ve pissed all over yourself. And by the way, dousing yourself in so much perfume that a spark would ignite you from across the room is not good personal hygiene. Brushing your teeth is not optional, it’s mandatory.
Just a few thoughts to make your experience, and ours, more pleasant.
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